How I negotiated 12 weeks paid maternity leave at a 5-person venture backed company
A photo from just after returning from maternity leave with Judah.
When I started at this new company almost 2 years ago it wasn’t without some hesitation. I had a great job - that I truly loved - that had real benefits. I’m talking unlimited paid time off, free lunches, free downtown parking that I could access 24/7, and real parental benefits like 12 weeks full pay maternity leave. I took advantage of that policy when I had Judah and actually ended up taking 14 weeks off with him. I returned to that job and was greeted with a whole host of other benefits that I hadn’t even realized were benefits at the time - a dedicated mother’s room where I could pump, understanding coworkers (who were also parents) who could take over if I had to rush to pick up a sick child from daycare, and a company that let me cut waaay back on my travel schedule after having Judah. They even let me overnight ship breast milk while I was traveling if I wanted and they covered the cost.
I gave all this up in favor of taking a gamble on an unproven company with very few benefits. My main reason for leaving my previous dream role was that I want my sons to be unafraid to make big courageous decisions with their own life. There was a high likelihood that the new role wouldn’t work out, but I WANTED to take it, I was interested, I was passionate about seeing how a company of this size works, and I didn’t want to spend my life wondering what if. But I also didn’t want to be stupid. I knew that I wasn’t done having kids yet, and I knew that if I went to a company with no maternity policy I would be essentially taking a massive paycut for the year that I had that kid. Money isn’t everything, but when you have real expenses like daycare and diapers and a food bill for 3 growing boys it certainly becomes a priority to think about. In addition, it comes down to how I want to be treated and considered as an employee. I will not be okay with any company moving forward that does not value their female employees enough to give them paid maternity benefits.
There is no big secret to how I negotiated this - I simply told the CEO/founder that I was unwilling to work someplace that didn’t put it in writing in my contract that when the time came, I would be guaranteed 12 weeks of full paid maternity leave. The key to making this ask successful though was that I was truly willing to walk away from the role if he couldn’t match what I was asking for. I realize that I was in a privileged position since I was also working for a company and job that I already loved, but it did come down to me putting value on myself and what my needs were in order to ask for what I deserved. I’ve always been one to undervalue my worth and what I bring to the table, and I’ve often undersold myself (and then regretted it immediately), and I knew going into this role that since I was taking such a big risk I wouldn’t be willing to settle for anything less than what I needed.
Here are my three takeaways from the experience of asking for this:
Understand, in your own mind, what your true deal breakers are and what you are willing to do if they are not met. For me, this meant presenting very clearly to the CEO that I would be unwilling to leave my current position without this clause in my contract.
Be willing to articulate those needs super clearly. I actually wrote my own contract clause for maternity leave so that it wouldn’t be extra work for him to figure out the details of what I wanted. He then had their legal counsel review it and then it was approved.
Even if it’s scary, be willing to ask for what you want or need. I have held back in so many other positions and had regrets or straight up hostility towards my workplace after being hired because of holding back. And the problem wasn’t theirs - it was mine for never asking! You won’t ever get what you don’t ask for, and even if people aren’t thrilled about giving it to you, they’ll at least know where you stand.
This isn’t to paint some rosy picture of how this maternity leave will actually be pulled off. It is looming in the not-so-distant future and the CEO is panicking a bit about how my work will be covered while I’m out. That is a post for another day though. Honestly, asking for and getting this paid maternity leave in my contract is one of those badass boss babe moments that I am most proud of in my career up to this point, and I wanted to share that how I got it was not magic - it was simply asking (well maybe more like demanding).